What is wrong with me?

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‘Why am I doing this to myself?’ I hear you ask. You could be at home binge watching Game of Thrones while crushing a giant bag of boom chicka pop. But no. Instead, you head off to training to push your body to the limit, mentally exhaust your brain BEFORE tackling the 2 hours of trig homework your teacher so happily assigned, all while being screamed at by your coach telling you you’re not working hard enough. WTF? Why do you do this? What is wrong with you? Let’s find out.
‘I can’t, I have soccer’ or ‘I have a huge game this weekend, I have to head home, eat some pasta and get some sleep”
Sound familiar?
Your friends look at you with a “good-for-her-for-being-#sportyspice-but-she-needs-a-life” face.
What your friends don’t know, but what you and I know, is that you are actually kind of sort of happy to use your training as an excuse to leave.
Sure, you love hanging out with your friends, eating, showing each other funny videos that come up on your Facebook timelines and tagging each other in memes, but you need more.
You love to train, push yourself mentally and physically and just enjoy shutting the thoughts in your brain off for a second. You need competition. You need the comradery of your teammates pushing you through the wind sprints, hills runs, and beeps tests. You need the joy of winning and the agony of defeat. This is the stuff that keeps you alive.
This is your me-time. You’re good at this. You can forget about everything else, about other people (except your teammates obviously… you could literally never forget them. After the last 6-hour bus ride, you tried, but nope, you just can’t), and just get sh#t done.
Ask yourself these questions:

1. Would it make you happy to spend every Saturday or Sunday morning/afternoon at home watching your favourite TV series?
2. Would you like to have a completely unplanned afternoon after school EVERY SINGLE DAY and not just on non-training days?
3. Would you be okay with not being ‘the athletic one’ in your friend group?

If you answered all three with ‘No’, then you get 10 points. (We’re all athletes here, I know you wanted a reward for reading this)
So, to get back to the initial question of ‘Why am I doing this to myself?’ Well…
Your ‘problem’ is that you need to have a purpose. And I am not talking about the what-is-the-purpose-of-life stuff.
You just want more from life than hanging out with friends and family, and doing homework. That life just simply wouldn’t be enough. You have the skill. You have the drive. You have passion.
Nobody should ever try and make you feel guilty about the fact that you would sometimes rather put your body through pain and stress and sweat, than spending hours on Snap Chat. Don’t get me wrong, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with going out with friends or watching TV. I mean, it’s great fun, that’s why we all do it. But it is all about #balance.
So, if you were looking to truly find out what’s wrong with you, here’s the answer; not one damn thing. You’re good. You’re doing just fine.
Athletes are simply built differently. We like work, we like challenges, we like sweat, hell… we even like tears. We are strangely proud of our scars, broken bones, and bruises. Who doesn’t love wearing short shorts to show off a nasty turf burn?
Some don’t understand this, and that’s ok. Not everyone is meant to understand. It’s what makes us elite, and what makes athletics not for everyone. Keep pushing yourself to the next level and before you know it, you will achieve it.

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